Month: May 2018

Mom Life

My “Mom Attire” is Multi-Functional

My Messy Bun – A food safety benefit.  When I prep the many meals for my family during the day, my messy bun keeps all my hair in place proving to be as efficient as a hairnet. My Yoga Pants –  Highly effective when having to climb into playground equipment to retrieve my child or […]

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Kid Stories

20 perks to being pint-sized

My firstborn was a preemie, coming into the world 8 weeks early after yours truly had a nasty spat with eclampsia and HELLP syndrome that nearly killed us both.  While I can say the monstrously high blood pressure, low blood platelets, seizures, and failing kidneys are safely in my past, my son has had trouble […]

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Mom Life

Mombie

Mombie:  / mam-bee /  Noun A mother who is consumed by raising her children to the point of being sleep deprived or simply obsessed, zombie-like. ————————————————————————————————————————————– As a fellow Mombie, let me welcome you. If you’re the mom to a baby who has yet to sleep through the night, you’re in good company.   Currently, […]

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Mom Rant

I am Sisyphus and this is my boulder.

Sisyphus. You know the myth. Too crafty for his own good in cheating death, so he was doomed to roll a boulder up hill just to have it roll down over and over again for an eternity. There are days I feel like he is my brother from another mother. That, maybe, I was too […]

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Mom Life

Welcome to my Village

On most days if you’d walk into my house, you might think you’ve walked back in time to when dinosaurs and caveman roamed the Earth.   My 3yo is shirtless and probably foraging food off the floor.  I’m probably carrying my baby around on my hip as he’s flailing his arms around and drooling. Often […]

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Mom Rant

For the love of everything holy, don’t have a holiday baby

I, Emily, am a holiday baby. I came blazing into this world on the back of a bottle rocket on the 4th of July in the city of brotherly love (or you know, the more traditional way- pried from my morphine-dosed mother in a hospital room full of medical personnel and my father wondering why […]

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Kid Craziness, Mom Life, Mom Rant

My Child…the Champion of Marathon Eating

Trust me, my kid is worse than yours.  It’s not that she’s super picky. Although, she’s definitely that too.  It’s that she’s insanely distracted and takes longer to eat than a sloth. I’ve tried everything.  Timers, losing privileges, throwing her food away, incentives for finishing, saying she needs to eat fast like a cheetah and […]

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Mom Life

28/f/SAHM, u?

Okay, I’ll admit it.  Being a stay at home parent is terribly lonely. When I was pregnant with my first child, my husband and I agreed we did not want daycare and that me staying at home would be an eventual goal once finances allowed.  So, for the first year of my son’s life, I […]

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Mom Life, Mom Rant

To the Moms I Used to Judge Before I Had Kids

I owe you an apology.  I can’t tell you how many times I used to be annoyed by someone else’s kids and thought to myself, why won’t that mom control her kid? And now, I understand. I remember being on a plane and seeing this woman with a 6 or 7 month old baby.  He […]

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Kid Craziness, Mom Life

50 places I have found Cheerios

Here is an extensive list of all the places I have found Cheerios: A variety of shoes More than a few diapers In my pockets The dryer The pantry The refrigerator Inside the detergent compartment of the dishwasher Inside an envelope at the Oscars Toy box My lunch box The sandbox Pandora’s box The box […]

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